Why you are single?

These days people around me start to asks me why I'm still single while a girl in my age already has kid? Ehm... hard to answer. Usually I just answer that I didn't find my destiny my Mr.Right. Actually I already want to have someone to life together, to share, to care and enjoying life sad and happy together. I'm single not because I'm not trying my Mr. but I'm trying to find him too. Sometime I feel and have question to my self why people seem so easy to found their other half but me feels so hard. 

Many time fails and be broken heart, it was not something joyful, it was hurt too. I was trying many times, I though it was gonna work when I'm trying to date a divorced man because I think he had experience before but it seem he ignore me. And my best friend told me after too much hurt usually you will find your other half soon. But again broken heart and build trust make relationship and broken heart again and back build relationship. Who was wrong? I don't know, but I felt I can't trust them anymore when I felt they become ignore me when their mouth said that they are taking serious relationship with me. Who will believe that they become ignore me when I was like the flower just blossom, need more love and attention but they treat me nothing. I don't want to judge them now, I just a little bit share maybe you are have same feeling with me now.

I just read about the reason why I'm single but no one of them describe my situation now. The mention the reason to be single into 6 points. They are:

1. High standard

2. Negatif

3. Not listening

4. Environment when I live

5. Trap in past memmories

6. I don't want a relationship

Well... see no one of those point describe me. About high standard, ehm... I do have standard but I think it is normal. The best describe about why I'm single now because I don't want to have relationship with someone which I don't like and I didn't find my Mr.. So it is mean some men also asked me but I refuse because I feel I don't like their appearance, spirit, principal, etc. And the bored deal when I like someone almost too much but they don't like me as much as me. Ya... just be patient and keep trying to find him. I'm sure he is also trying and my friend told me don't lower my standard because I'm deserve better. 

Trust and rely everything in God, we are human we only can try and effort the decision and result let God decide and manage it.

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Silence

When I don't want to talk and share about my love stories then this blog become abandon. Maybe silence is better because since I posted about my love stories in here some anonymous posted hate comment. Acknowledgement I created this blog to reduce my burden when I was with my x. Because I was felt that my relationship with him won't work but he pushed me to try, confess and confess again. At first I was happy but after tried more my doubt and different in everything. Fought and fought then try to break for 1 month then a message was receipt that he will marry. Ahh.... so dumb!

It was past, it was hurt but let it flow and gone. Forgive him for every single mistake he did to me. (But sometime when I remember the bad side when was with him, I like to curse him too. hihihi) I am trying to forgive and forget him. I don't want to know more about him. I was not feel hurt too much when he left me just feel like wasted. Life goes on, I'm trying to move on. I hope I won't be noisy, share everything here. I will try to silence and not to talk about my life. Then am I will left this blog?

The answer is "no!" I still care this blog but maybe a little. I hope I will share important and useful advice about relationship, married and family because I'm sure I will need that too. But sometime I will spit all of my burden here again when I need it. Ya... I need this blog, I need to release my burden than I depress. I try to keep calm and silence by write it in here. For all who don't like with all my complicated stories then don't read it, it is better than left hater comment.

Someone who left you now then someday they finally will leave you too.

God took something for you may God will change it for better.

You think what you see is good but maybe someday you will realize and grateful that it is not yours anymore. 

Sometime silence is treasure.

Life is mystery and a gift.

Ok... have a nice day...

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Tips: Dating With Divorced or Widowed Man

Dating and marry is your issue now because you already want to care or live with someone. Then dating or even married with divorced or widowed need a different preparation than dating or marrying with single man. It is important to know if you consider as open minded person because open minded mean you will accept what the way your couple since you know him but also not living or doesn't care with his past.

With the Widowed

If you find a companion of a widower who divorced his wife dead or dying, there are some important things to note. Try to understand that the "ex" will always be come to your lover life, also his son or daughter. So do not ever compare yourself or otherwise replicate your self to her (the deceased).

Better to introduce your own style and who you are. For example, if the deceased housewife is a graceful woman then try introduce you as the cheerful side. This will give a new perspective, while providing a signal you do not want to replace the mother of the children of your partner. Especially for a widower who not too long ago his wife passed away so she still remain a lot in his mind and the kids then try to lift up the energy and atmosphere by expertise that might be required of children after the death of his mother, for example, you cook healthy food, delicious, fast and lunch school with them.

With the Divorced

If you are dating a divorced man and he relates well with ex-wife, then you need to be encouraged. In this condition, usually the former is often arise in the life of your spouse, especially if there are children from first marriage. Whether it is communicate by a phone call or shuttle service transports children to the school, its make the children have to divide their time off, so sometimes they had to meet to discuss various things about the child.

You have to be prepared to deal with and interact with the former is a regular. You do not have to relate familiar with the ex-wife couples, but at least try to have communication with her. Because hostility would bring the former to provoke your children to not accept his new mother.

Divorce and child-rearing duties are also not cheap prices.You have to accept that their financial future is now and will not be entirely to you. For example, it could be he will reduce the dinner with you, because the money being drained to the child's school registration fees or other purposes. Bitter indeed, but this shows responsibility. Another thing, you also need to prepare ourselves with the notion or the bad girl bullies. The divorce itself was very painful. Now, the ex or the kids have to face the new love of his father.

Hope it will help. Courtesy by Kompas.com

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After Knowing Infidelity Spouse: Forgive or Leave?

Many of us would agree with a value, whatever the reason cheating is not justified. Every time you hear the story of a friend who betrayed, you are definitely angry. Never mind, people you know, news of celebrity infidelity alone can make you sympathetic, angry, or hard to criticize an opinion.

Like the case of infidelity that recently made headlines intensively between Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. After Kristen Stewart apologizes arise Kasak new buzz, if Robert Pattison will forgive her? Is it possibly Robert giving forgiveness to Kristen after a public humiliation?

But in the meantime, what if you are in a similar situation? It might be easy to say "I leave it alone!" or "If I were you I would never forgive!", if the affair is not your spouse. If the he, what the world is not destroyed it?

But after it all happened, he's apologized. It seems really - really and you still love her very much. What's next? Before you take it again there are four things you should consider:

1. Does this happen at all?
You need to know for sure is the case because the affair was a blunder or a long term relationship. He's secretly been in a relationship for months with another woman. Actually, two things are not the reason for him to justify the deed, but if there are children involved (as in the case of director Rupert Sanders is having an affair with a Christian) it could not hurt to be considered. There are ups and downs of relationships, perhaps when there's a defense mechanism he is weak.

2. Whether he admits or you are caught?
If you find through friends or through his email, due to the pain of betrayal will be worse than if he confessed to you directly.

3. Is he going memeberi you the space to recover?
Hurt, angry, disappointed and all the negative feelings that arise from the consequences will not be easily lost perselingkungan by saying sorry. You need space to think and rethink about your relationship. What are you looking for in a relationship? Space is also important to him think about his motives for cheating and actually realized his mistake. You certainly do not want to take it back and then to speak of this matter ngungkit lifetime.

4. Do you really forgive?
This is the hardest part. Even if he had vowed never to repeat it again and you are back together, there will be times when your emotions explode. Worse yet you live in suspicion. It is not only bad for the relationship but also be biting confidence, because you always feel threatened. Convince yourself first, if you can believe again before reconciliation.

Courtesy Kompas.com

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