Nothing like him

Why like this? Why I can't forget him? Today I feel missing my x so much, I look at his pictures, damn... still I never bored look at him. Why it is like this? We didn't say break, but he just left me. I feel I didn't let him go too, he is still alive, yesterday I added his fb account with my second id. He accepted it, maybe because he don't know that was me. I can't believe if he left me because he don't like me anymore because I read on his fb sometime hi told it is pain. Yes, my x left me because he is sick, really sick. He was diagnose with brain tumor. I think he was thinking that there is no life after, i think he think that he will gonna die. Why he don't want just enjoy be with me? Is he really love me like I love him like stupid like this? I don't know anything about him now, I just saw his newest pictures, I see he is little bit skinny than before. But I saw too that he is still doing his activity like before. Maybe you have question, why I don't try to find him? The answer is simple, I know where he live but my money still not enough to go there. I'm dreaming if I can meet him now. He is very far with me, time different is 15 hours, you can count how far he is with me now. I saw he is still single too.

Really I feel betrayal my bf now, but I'm not sure with my bf too. I know my bf love me but to be with him small chance. And when I saw my bf photos, I feel my x is better than him for everything. I was have relationship with my x only for 3 months and with my bf already 7 months now, but why that 3 months can't be replace with this 7 months. I don't tell to my bf that I still love my x, still hope my x will back too, but here in my heart and mind I still love my x too much. I know it is my problem, I was love my x too much and I was told to my self that stop to search anyone, he is the one that you looking for. I think my soul don't want betrayal my commitment now, or my soul don't want love too much like I was love him, or my soul don't want replace him. I want he can recover be with me or not be with me. I love my MA. MA is his initial and my bf is DAS. I want to forget my x but when I try to forget him then I remember him more. It will past a year after he left me, still hope that he will back to me. He is sweet memory and strong feeling for me, nothing like him. I can't hurt my bf feeling, I tried to leave him because I don't want to hide my feeling for my x, but when I asked him to leave he is become sick and like crazy boy. Ehm... now feel complicated. I feel my life was perfect with my x, and my x told like that too,  hope his pain only test for us, I want him say hi to me again. I want my x comeback to me again. I want him....nothing like him.

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After broke up why it is hard to live without relationship?

Now I feel it is hard to live alone after broke up, I really missing him and feel jealous when I saw other couple happy. Still my bf is the one that I was talking about. Because of him I realize that to live alone without relationship is hard and pain. Maybe this is the reason why mostly women can't stay longer to be single when she ever have bf.  I think to have new bf after xbf can cure the pain and easy to forget the memories with xbf. I see it is different in men, when they already love a women then he will hard to forget and find new gf after he broke up. It is odd too, when a woman married and her husband pass away or been divorced, a woman can stay alone till she dead but mostly a man can't be single for long time after he married then he been divorced or his wife pass away.

It is complicated but some men judge his xgf so easy to forget their memories but he hard to forget it and hard to find new one. I don't how to call this situation but I think it is depend on emotional of the person. For me, after I broke up then I can't live alone for long time, I usually give up to find new bf after broke up about 2 months (it is maximum times I can stay single after broke up). I feel I tried everything to pass the sadness and the loneliness. Sometimes there is a someone come to my life and the we like each other then we become bf-gf, sometimes no one come but I tried to search someone through internet. Yeah I did love cyber, I know it is crazy but sometime I get someone who want to listen me and can made me forget my x. It is enough to erase the pain, after I'm fine to be in single then I  just enjoy to be single. It is hard when my friends who have couple asked me to go with them, really like forever alone.

I never doing sex with all my x, but why it is so hard and pain when he left me. How about they who lost their virginity with their bf then their bf leave her like trash? How pain full of that? With my bf now, I did little bit far than with all x bf before, with my bf now feel more emotional and full of desire, both feeling same but both try to keep virginity. It is sound stupid but it is our commitment, we already in relationship for 7 months but we didn't show both property or even doing sex. We did something sound like sex too but without touching, we did to release our desire which sometime burn us. Yeah.. we did like chat sex or phone sex, but we never show our private property. We only kiss through phone we didn't kiss in real too, we both dreaming to do that but not dare to touch each other. Sometime we both also crazy, so hard to control our desire, we want to see each other property, I can to keep mine secret but it seem he want to show but when he will show I said to him, don't show to me till you marry me.

For us it is important to keep both virginity because we think if we won't marry then we didn't lose any but if we will marry then he can be mine and I'm his. It is really hard but we try. I feel this is better but everything is up to you in relationship. Because everything is your responsible, everything you did is your risk but I choose to decrease risk.

I don't know if my bf will be my husband or not, but with him really I feel to much test, emotion and desire. Hope can keep our commitment till the time answer what we should to do.  Miss him now, he is back to his country, only can see his text 1 or 2 times a day. Why hard to leave when I feel love him, I don't like if he will leave when I'm in love with him like other xbf who left me when I was so mad on them because it was so hurt and pain.

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I was posted romantic thing in my friend's blog

Yea... I was posted romantic thing in my friend's blog, I hope the post that I wrote will hit her blog a lot but unfortunately it is only hits a little. Maybe I had to post something more romantic like kissing subject, but I'm afraid she won't like it. I think every blogger know how to hit their blogs, they usually use hot topic, but my friend so pure, she don't want to talk about hot things. Her blog talk about travel and she only like to talk about travel, but sometime she also talk other thing when she is mad. Hohoho...

Today I remember my post which I wrote in my friend blog, the title is Romantic proposal on photography shot. I was planned to use this title for my blog, but when my friend asked me to post something in her blog then I wrote it there. I hope my post will hit her blog at least with 100 visitor for only 1 title like my post which talk about kissing but it didn't like as my hope. So maybe I will think other subject but not pornography subject (I don't like it too) which can hit her traffic more. Actually her traffic not very terrible, 1 day more than 100 visitors (for real blogger maybe it is terrible but for me it is quit good rating) but she want to know how if she can get more visitors, like what will happen into her net income etc.

A few months ago I joined traffic gain website and I quite active there, it was effective to increase my traffic and I suggest this website to my friend too but she said this website only hit her domain name not other post, so people come to blog but not read anything. Then I suggest other website with same plan but she said it is tired to wait for clicking. Hahaha. Yeah.. she is right, real visitor who really interest with our post is better than visitors who only want to get traffic. I'm tired to clicking like her too, I only visit the website to gaining visitors sometime when I'm not busy or in bored. But really I like my friend's blog, maybe her English as bad as mine but she chooses very good topics and pictures.

I hope I can create other post for my friend which can hit her blog traffic a lot as mine soon.

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The reasons why your boyfriend have not applied you

After a long relationship with him, it is not wrong if you expect that he will take you to get married. The only problem is sometimes he makes you wait too long until you asks him to marry you. When you are ready to enter the next level, but he has not moved to invite you for marry, maybe you can see the reason behind it all.

1. Phobias
Maybe there's nothing to worry about when he asks you to be his lover. But marriage is another issue for him. Marriage is essentially a lifetime often frightened him, because marriage is the culmination of a commitment. That concern is not because he did not really love you, but due to the  temporary fear. There is still a chance he'll change his mind.

However, women often become too tired of waiting and finally think that he already do not like her anymore. However, a strong commitment will help to overcome this. Get her talking, and ask what is the fear. Show him that you are committed to sharing love with each other so that time can be skipped.

2. Afraid to be lost of freedom
Many men are afraid to marry because of the shadow of the failure of a marriage that often they see on television, or from the experiences of parents and friends. Sometimes they feel afraid to be controlled by their wives, so they will not be free to do anything. Naturally, when he was worried, because no one wants to be in a marriage where there is one person who controls another person. To fix this, tell him about your dream wedding and family who want you coached with him.

3. Fear of divorce
Many young couples who were not able to uphold their commitments, so finally decided to divorce. And, couples assume that divorce can happen when you both get married. Communication plays a very important role in healthy relationships. Talk about this divorce, and say that he need not worry about this. If you can establish good communication, a sense of mutual trust, mutual understanding, and mutual commitment to your marriage life, to what to think about divorce?

4. Not ready
And mental qualities themselves before entering the gates of marriage is very necessary. The time needed to prepare for each person was different. He needs more time to prepare themselves and mental qualities to be married than women.

5. He did not want to marry you
When he is old does not ask you to marry him, then chances are he was already comfortable with the current situation, and do not want to change it. He believes that marriage can change his habits, his values, arguably his whole life, so he would not do it. One sign that you can see from his actions when he used to divert your questions about marriage. When this event is often the case, then should you decide to stay with him or not.

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